So what’s going on with you? 15 months ago things were great, but ever since we hit a stumble at Manchester Marathon you’ve been off with me. I never know which version of you I’m going to get. We had a great training run up to that race and hit loads of PBs across 5k up to Half Marathon. But for the first time we got let down by my stomach and had to stop. I feel like since then you’ve been punishing me.
Remember when we hit the wall at Gloucester Half Marathon that summer? It was my first longer race after Manchester and we hit the wall at mile 8. I had to pull myself through the last 5 miles in complete agony and embarrassment. What was up with that? It came from nowhere.
But then our next race was Bournemouth 10k a few months later. OK we didn’t execute best race but we got a huge PB. That was the last time we did that. October 2017. I miss that. Can we go back to that please?
Because since then I really don’t know why I stay with you. I can’t take how many lows there are at the moment and I need things to go back to how they were. Or at least stop hurting so much. My stomach still aches from the race this morning.
Remember the Velopark 10k? We just never got going and died a slow death.
Thorpe Park Half? We got ill so couldn’t complete, but at least we had a good time.
Surrey Half? We matched my year standing PB to the very second and I was so mad at you. Why couldn’t we go any faster, we clearly had loads in the tank.
Silverstone 10k? Headed out hard and yet again, died a slow death.
And now Poole 10k… My stomach didn’t agree with what we were doing and decided to make us stop at mile 4. DNF in a 10k. I can’t take much more of this. Something needs to change.
I’ve made my peace with this being a bad running year, but I need some kind of reassure from you that things will come together at some point. This feels just like when I got injured in my teens and had to stop running all together for a few years. It’s like it’s happening all over again and I’m just not emotionally ready for that.
The highs have been amazing, so I’m not going to give up on you yet. But please could you be a bit kinder to me until we find a way to fix our relationship?
Thanks, I’m glad we had this talk.